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Last-minute holiday stuff

I dropped the boys off to Steve on Thursday night and sat in his living room while he decorated my former tree with my former ornaments.  I was a little saddened to see the boys' first Christmas ornaments go up.  Things between Steve and I are okay, not good, not horrible and I expect that as time goes on it will get easier to be around each other without that dull ache in the background flavoring every interaction.  We worked out the holiday schedule with no clashes.  Everything just seemed to fall into place and I am extremely grateful for that. 

Luckily, the boys were good with being dropped off and the only drama came in the form of my minivan not starting when I went to leave.  So Steve had to pull his minivan out and jump my battery.  I felt hugely embarrassed.

Wayne had taken his kids to Kids' Court to work off some energy before bringing them home so he had time and focus to talk with me during my long drive home.

Speaking of which, driving at night makes it apparent that I am rapidly aging and it terrifies me.  I have always had excellent eyesight and no issues with seeing at all.  In the past year or so, I've developed a scary problem with night driving wherein I get temporarily blinded by the headlights of oncoming cars.  It's like my pupils don't react quickly enough to the different levels of light.  So when there are a lot of oncoming cars with bright lights, my darker side of the road is BLACK in front of me and I can't see ANYTHING.  It only happens on dark, unlit highways.  On roads with streetlights, I am fine.  On back roads, I am fine.

Friday was spent sewing Christmas gifts for people.  I will take and post pictures at some point today.

Saturday morning, Lexi and Nathan were picked up by their mom.  Wayne has been asking, for some time, to meet her boyfriend, as he spends significant time around the kids.  This week, she brought him with her.  He sat in the car with the windows rolled up and didn't get out to come to the door.  She didn't introduce Wayne to the guy, Lexi did.  Lexi dragged Wayne over to the car and opened the door.  That little girl cracks me up.  Sometimes her precociousness annoys me, in this case, it was perfect.  The guy still didn't get out of the car but he did (limply) shake Wayne's hand and say hello.  One step at a time, I guess.  

After they left, Wayne and I spent some time going over our holiday lists, trying to figure out how to complete the tasks required to be ready for Christmas.  Shopping, wrapping, baking, organizing... lots to take care of and we're still not done.  We spent the remainder of the day working toward the finish line, but not quite reaching it.

Yesterday, Steve brought the boys back to me.  The day was going perfectly.  I procrastinated on my baking and was sitting on the couch thinking about what a lovely day it had been.  Wayne was watching various football games, the kids were playing nicely, I was reading a book.  The power went out for two and a half hours.  The kids were scared and didn't understand what happened.  Wayne was upset because he couldn't see the Falcons game, which was vital to their playoff chances.  I was hungry.  We loaded the kids up into the car and headed out to see how far the blackout stretched and to get Happy Meals for the boys at McDonald's.  They are obsessed with Happy Meals.  An additional benefit to the "Get in the Car Plan," was that Wayne could listen to the game on Sirius.  It was a win-win, so off we went. 

Three towns were out of power.  We drove to McD's and to a gas station.  When we got home, the power was back.  Andy had fallen asleep in the car and did not want to go to bed.  He was up until almost 11.  I spent most of the evening playing some silly Facebook game and putting together the Powerpoint for my demo teach tomorrow. 

It's still not done.  I have a lot left to do and between the kids vying for my attention and my own tendencies to procrastinate I am having problems.  I am giving it tomorrow so I need to FOCUS, yet here I am on LJ.  The boys are bouncing between me and playing so it's hard to concentrate.  I am not sure that this is a coherent post.  

Comments

( 6 comments — Leave a comment )
glass_lion
Dec. 22nd, 2008 04:02 pm (UTC)
I have night blindmess too. {{{}}}

That's pretty cool that Wayne's kids' mom's boyfriend (whew) was at all willing to meet with Wayne. I've been in the boyfriend's position and refused.
purplejuli
Dec. 22nd, 2008 04:57 pm (UTC)
They've been dating for almost 2 years so it's not like he's new to the situation. Wayne and I agree that if someone is going to be spending significant time with our children, then we need to, at least, meet them. He's been asking her for awhile.
glass_lion
Dec. 22nd, 2008 05:48 pm (UTC)
Oh, I agree that in your position I'd want to meet the boyfriend!

I'm just saying that having been the "boyfriend," I said "no thanks - this drama is just between the former spouses and if I want to be interviewed I'll apply for a job." :) I can understand HIS position too. Not fun.

Hence why I no longer date single dads.
(Deleted comment)
glass_lion
Dec. 22nd, 2008 05:55 pm (UTC)
I think we can agree to disagree, ok? Just giving his perspective, the third-wheel perspective. I understand your perspective - just saying there's another, equally valid viewpoint from people who weren't part of the marriage and don't feel they owe anything to the former spouse of the person they are dating.
purplejuli
Dec. 22nd, 2008 05:58 pm (UTC)
I deleted my comment because I realize you're making a valid point that doesn't need to be argued.

It's another one of those blended family nightmares. The third party doesn't owe anything to the former spouse but the former spouses owe it to each other and to their kids to maintain safe and healthy relationships.

I guess I'm touchy about this because Steve's ex (when we were together) dated drug dealers, ex cons, abusive men, etc. While it's not always cool to judge a book by it's cover, when the cover screams, "YOU KID ISN'T SAFE AROUND ME," you should be able to pay attention to that.
glass_lion
Dec. 22nd, 2008 06:13 pm (UTC)
I totally empahize with you and validate your frustration! Absolutely! Just giving the other side, equally valid.

"Blended family nightmare" indeed. I'm sorry, Juli. It's not fair.
( 6 comments — Leave a comment )