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I really hate my MIL

She f****** did it again.  I really can't believe it.

I got home from work to find an empty house, which ticked me off to begin with.  It's Rachel's birthday and she and Steve are going to the movies tonight to see Chronicles of Narnia.  There isn't time to make dinner for them before they go so Steve was going to get McDonald's before they left.  I thought we agreed that the best approach was to pick up Andy from daycare and stop for fast food on the way to the house.  Once home, they could eat.  Apparently Steve thought it would save time to come home first and get Rachel, then go out again for food.  Whatever...

So I got home and there's a box from MIL addressed to Rachel and Andy.  Their birthday presents.  (Andy's birthday is the 4th.)  It's not been opened yet.  I am really glad Steve didn't let Rachel open it because his mother has a tendency to buy really inappropriate clothes for her. 

I opened it. Inside, there's a department store shirt box for Andy.  I open that-- two pairs of Carters sweatpants.  Probably a 4T-- maybe $25 total, right?  I'm sure the tags are still on them.  What's in the box for Rachel?  Three sweaters, a blouse, a beanie baby, a CD and some American Girl lip gloss! 

HOW IS THAT FUCKING FAIR??!?!??!?!?!?

Why does one grandchild get TWICE AS MUCH for a gift as the other.  She treats Andy like a second class citizen and I am so SICK of it.  Steve really needs to step up to the plate and call her out on this ABSOLUTE BULLSHIT. 

 

Comments

( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
sweetjezebel
Dec. 30th, 2005 08:29 am (UTC)
Yup, she did it again. That sucks. :( What did Steve have to say about it when he got home? Is one of you going to say something and put her in her place?

Hehe... I was just thinking you should send back, lets see, she got 7 items and he got 2? You should send back 5 of the higher priced items to make it equal and include a note stating that since she can't find it in her heart to be fair, you are both going to do it for her. :)
redqueenmeg
Dec. 30th, 2005 01:27 pm (UTC)
include a note stating that since she can't find it in her heart to be fair, you are both going to do it for her. :)

That is AWESOME.
purplejuli
Dec. 30th, 2005 02:04 pm (UTC)
You know, this is really the best idea on how to deal with this that I've heard yet. When I get home today I'll ask Rachel to choose which two things she wants and I'll send the rest back to MIL.

I was miserable all last night, my stomach tied in knots, over this... I so hate her. I really do.

Good thing I believe in karma-- she'll get what she deserves at some point.
mommycal
Dec. 30th, 2005 05:45 pm (UTC)
I saw that you posted about this a few minutes ago. I agree this is a great idea. Its very childish and unfair to do what she's doing. SORRY but that's just WRONG! SEND back what R doesn't want!
usedmonk
Dec. 30th, 2005 08:02 pm (UTC)
I don't know if putting Rachel in the middle by asking her to choose what you are going to send back is right. Then it will seem to her that you are punishing her by taking things away. This is obviously not the intent, but perception is key. If she has already seen all of her presents, this is a problem. I will try to call tonight to talk about it.
sweetjezebel
Dec. 30th, 2005 08:49 pm (UTC)
When I get home today I'll ask Rachel to choose which two things she wants and I'll send the rest back to MIL.

As I wrote in the newest post you made, this is not what I meant to do. Of course, it's completely up to you what you WANT to do but personally I don't think Rachel should be punished for her grandmothers nasty behavior. I was hoping if she hadn't seen any of the stuff yet, then YOU could choose two nice things for her and give them each their 2 items and then send back the rest. What she doesn't know shouldn't hurt her, hopefully.
purplejuli
Dec. 30th, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC)
Of course, she's already got it. She was home when the mail came and had the box in the living room with the phone on top of it when I got home. I think I already posted somewhere the two issues with my MIL.

Had I sent stuff back before Rachel had seen it, MIL would have asked her about each item and when Rachel said all she got was two sweaters, MIL would tell her, oh, you were supposed to get X, Y, & Z too. I guess Juli took them away from you.

redqueenmeg
Dec. 30th, 2005 01:27 pm (UTC)
I agree. Ugh, how irritating.

I'm lucky my MIL has no other grandchildren and doesn't grudge me for making her son a dad at 22. ;)
purplejuli
Dec. 30th, 2005 02:05 pm (UTC)
Steve was an early dad too. When he married the Bitch, oh, I mean Rachel's mother, he was 20, I think, and she already had a small baby and was pregnant with another (neither were his) and then Rachel was born when he was 24.

rockysmomma
Dec. 30th, 2005 05:48 pm (UTC)
Sorry you're going through this. I don't know the whole history but I do agree that it isn't fair.

I just read your CC thread about this and I think that was a great idea your friend suggested. Good luck with all of this.
purplejuli
Dec. 30th, 2005 09:04 pm (UTC)
I just don't know what to do but I'm so stressed out over this whole mess that I want to curl up in a little ball with my munchkin and cry. I just don't understand how she can constantly short him.

My MIL calls every Sunday night to talk to Steve and Rachel. She and Steve will talk for at least an hour. Do you know how many weeks go by where she never even asks, "So how is Andy doing?"

Steve will sometimes interrupt whatever thing she's talking about to give news about Andy and she changes the subject back to whatever.

When Steve told her we were expecting another child, her response was SILENCE. No congratulations. Nothing. Silence. When Steve mentioned it again a week later she said, "Do you really think that's for the best with all of the issues you're having right now?"

I was already pregnant-- it's not like we could say, "You know, you're right. We should hold off." Baby was already on the way.

I hate her-- she's so TOXIC!
rockysmomma
Dec. 30th, 2005 09:21 pm (UTC)
W.O.W.

That is just so blatently spiteful, I can't believe it. It is one thing if she has a problem with you but to take it out on a little kid is so wrong.

I am so sorry! (hugs)
purplejuli
Dec. 30th, 2005 09:40 pm (UTC)
Thanks...

I mean, look at that little face- how could anyone *not* love him?
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )